Archived entries for words

Fhoke Studio

I really like this portfolio site for the UK studio Fhoke because it mixes grids, big copy, textures, and shadows in a modern, yet not too overwhelming sort of way. It is not extraordinary, but these are the type of grids we should be looking at to inspire ourselves in not repeating the same website over and over again.

Their project: The Little Cake Parlour reminds me a bit of how we (at Fluid) solved the Benefit Cosmetics design, which included a lot of “faking” ribbons and adding PNG assets to break off from the square edges. Benefit turned out better than this example, but it is always nice to see how other people solve similar issues.

Fhoke them… http://www.fhoke.com/

-Alex

Entre Trenes Iluminados… Again In Europe

Everything Is...

Reflections, realities that get suffocated by dreams, lack of appreciation… constant search for the unknown, very aware that what’s unknown is what remains beautiful, and what’s discovered becomes dead. Train, after train, after train.

What a beautiful trip filled with thoughts and incantations. Nothing like abandoning your schedule to be able to think differently than before. I was absolutely blocked before this season finale episode started, also known as my “vacation.” My thoughts… gone. I had lived without a nice pocket digital camera for a while, and I felt the magic of the snapshot… of recording real life through an angle of emotions had disappeared. Before I left, I fixed this by getting a new pocket camera. I wasn’t going to allow myself to continue living such a dry proof-less existence.

IMG_1530.JPG

The conversation with myself restarted as I got on a plane to go to France. In fact, it started the night before, as I became sick… sick with anticipation of what was ahead of me in the trip. You see, the older I get, the more scared I become. It is not fear of what could happen to me, but fear of having to go through too much trouble to get around, or robbed of my wallet, or sick. Soon enough I compared myself to the person I was 10 years ago, traveling with my first girlfriend through uncharted European lands. I realize my now ex-girlfriend probably knows more of me back then, than I do. Lacking a good memory, I get around by images and instinct. How to reconstruct who you were, if you don’t even remember how you got where you are. You just know this place where you stand now is yours once more, and it has been found by you again through fate, and not through planning. And that the moment you touched the memory, you complete a test you didn’t even know you were taking.

The present always feels eternal, and the past… a dream.

This flickr album contains snapshots of my spotless mind as I move through Italy, Switzerland, and France through the happy summer of 2010. A summer that confronts me with who I used to be, stimulating instincts left behind by forgotten memories. A summer full of textures and angles; where I make love to each curve and edge of my environment through my view finder.

Enjoy,
-Your Imaginary Dream Farmer, The one who lives when the Giant Wolf is asleep.

Jack, Marla & The Holy Folk

In A Hurry

Finally lost it. It was about time anyway…

There comes a moment in a man’s life in which he either continues to live his life the way it was intended, or he becomes a saint.

I am a saint. I am holy. But who’s to say I chose sanctity, when in fact, it chose me.

Are saints born to sanctity, or do they become saints along the way?

When you see homeless people in the street… you can react in one of three ways: The first way is to ignore them, the second is to spare them some change (to relieve your guilty conscience from your true lack of empathy, specially if you are white), and the third way is… by mirroring. When you see this disgrace of a person, this creature, this ghost… you see yourself. “This is really me.”

Fear.

Believe it or not, some people who look homeless, really aren’t. They are extreme urban campers. People who love camping so much, they never stop.

The Anangu people in Alice Springs, Australia share a legend regarding the Milky Way. You must keep in mind, these people are surrounded by nothing but stars, so they get to see heavens the way the rest of us only dream of. Yup, while some of us have to go to church and look up to enjoy frescos painted in some dome just to imagine the greatness of god, the “natives” see the real thing. They see god, every fucking night. And like all holy folk, they are aware of the existence of magical hours (since mythical creatures tend to favor some hours over others to manifest themselves to us pathetic mortals). Well, the Anangu say that if you manage to stay up past 3AM, you will see the big emu of heavens spreading his wings, and igniting his eyes in true celestial splendor. Well, at least that’s what the white tour guide told us.

As I began my path to holiness, I also discovered the existence of magical moments in which knowledge shifts, spirits move from realm to realm, and asshole telepathic gurus shag their invisible cocks at unsuspecting sleeping girls across the continent. My little discovery was that if you live in certain parts of the planet, and you happen to wake up at precisely 5AM, you’ll feel the same fright lost souls feel as their spiritual rotting flesh boils in hell’s eternal fire. At 5AM exact, you WILL know that you will die. But I’m not talking about “knowing” you will die, I’m talking about “KNOWING KNOWING” you will die. You will see context; you will FEEL context. You will know that everything you love, in 20 years will have stopped existing… and the smell of death will saturate the sweaty room. You know that through some weird quantum leap, in which all possible stories unravel simultaneously, you died at 5AM… and you were all alone.

Only a matter of time.

At 5AM they always come for me.

Like Francisco De Asís with his hallucinations, the average bum engages with the citizens of Narnya every night. Like Jesus, they physically manifest their holiness. Their stigmata are putrefactive ulcers that cover their sticky skin. Instead of nails to the palms, needles to the veins. Their Eucharist is a bacon and cheese biscuit. When the rest of us wake up to an alarm clock, they wake up to sunshine.

Marla, did you become holy too? Every time I call your phone, an old lady answers. Are you just ignoring me or did you really switch numbers?

After MIGRA destroyed my fake marriage, and kicked my immigrant husband out of the country, not only did they take my best friend, but they also took the centrifugal force behind the Green Fungus party scene. MIGRA not only ruined a tradition of parties, but a fellowship of orphans. A group of misfits who enjoy being clever as much as Catholic priests enjoy the company of children, or Republican politicians enjoy their South American prostitutes. With his absence, Green Fungus plans to take over the streets and replant a tree in every crack of hot asphalt ceased to exist. Like all great movements, they really depend on one individual. So fragile and insignificant our lives and efforts are, that any form of success or change seems to come out of plain coincidence, or the exploits of one idiot everyone seems to listen to. Take out the idiot, and his followers might disperse; but if they don’t… they’ll turn his memory into a mockery of sanity. If you were that idiot, your friends might convert your idiosyncrasies to law. Your habits to dogma. Your taste to the way. And if your idiots are really idiotic, your way becomes the only way.

Disgrace.

Emma comes over almost every night, fucks me, and leaves. Something about me tossing and turning constantly doesn’t please her. She also says I’ve picked up sleepwalking. Because of this, I no longer sleep naked.

5AM hits. I hear dog’s claws against my hardwood floor. This wouldn’t be so alarming if I only had a dog! The claws stop abruptly next to my sleeping body. My eyes search for the dog, yet he’s no longer there. I shiver sensing his presence; he touches me with wet paws, not letting me move a muscle. Something evil has arrived. Petrified I can only hear the voice in my head that says, “Be mine. Work for me.”

That next day, I no longer can walk.

I cry alone, suffocate in my own tears. No one is there for me… at least no one I want. The doctors don’t know what’s wrong with me… like Tom Cruise says in my favorite scientologist training video, it is all psychosomatic. Besides, the doctors don’t really try hard… I have shitty health insurance after all.

Each night, I’m terrified to let go… to descend into that state of intimacy with the other world. The veil is torn like a 12 year-old Thai hymen.

I can’t fight the drowsiness. My eyes close against my will again, and at 5AM the wet dog jumps on my bed, very much uninvited. He disappears. I stay up in panic until 8am hits. Sunshine hits my face, I’m finally protected. “Must… get… to work.” My feet touch the ground trying to pull the crutches towards me. The floor is all wet. Wet as in REAL LIFE wet. I must have spilled my cup of water at some point during the night. Doesn’t make this less creepy. I crutch my way to work and smile through a shitty day.

When you don’t sleep well at night, it is hard to perform during the day. Thank goodness for porn! Xtube.com… Megaporn.com… and YouPorn.com work way better than coffee for me. Problem is, my coworkers don’t seem to like that I roll like that. Why don’t they rat me out? Because I can’t walk… and because they social network their ass off during work hours. A mix of guilt and the middle class’ condescending attitude can go a long way.

Stalemate.

What is more legitimate? To shag off as I answer costumer service calls, or to tweet about your coworker shagging off?

After a month of doing a shitty job as a disabled person, having everything fall off my hands like the worthless human I am, they tell me to come back to the office when I’m all better. No word regarding my hyper porn addition. Something has shifted.

Night hits again, and suddenly, instead of fear… I feel some sort of excitement. The anticipation of the nightmare is not as terrible as it was a month ago. In fact, it gives me something to do in my newfound lazy existence. Strangely enough, the whole night goes through, and not a single nightmare shows up. That’s when I realized, nightmares are like rapists, they won’t cum if you are begging for it.

The Unluckiest Day: September 17, 2009

Unluckiest Day Of The Year

Today, September 17, 2009 is the unluckiest day of the year, as explained by Susan Miller. We are going through a very bad Mercury Retrograde (astrologically speaking), and sure, you might roll your eyes now, but you’ll be happy when the bad luck is over, and thankful that I warned you.\n\nIn this entry I’m doing to document (almost by the minute) what unusual things I encounter today, and I’ll try to find out if it is possible that by being aware of your bad luck, you can actually end it.

9:27PM – Pilled it up. Sighs. Funny, I wanted the moral of this story to be more along the lines of “luck is what you make of it”

8:15PM – Realizes I cannot go to tonight’s party… and surely I’ll have to work from home tomorrow.

7:00PM – “Hopped” out of the office.

5:15PM – “Congratulation” messages regarding my newly found disability. Word spreads like fire. Hmmm, or can you spread words like butter?

4:40PM – The massage lady at the office tells me I have flat feet! I’ve been lied to. My feet never developed an arch as certain people who once upon a time prayed for me told me I miraculously did. Now I have to buy special disabled people equipment.

4:30PM – My shirt is inside out!

3:34PM – Tonight is Hicki’s last party. RIP to Hicki nights… I guess I’ll have to go there tonight.

2:29PM – My project manager tells me she loves me :) The very same project manager who almost didn’t receive my email at 8:34AM. Gasp…

1:58PM – While I’m inside the bathroom, I realize I forget to lock the door. Luckily, I lock it, before any embarrassing naked disasters take place.

1:02PM – I take off my shoe because the pain in my right foot is increasing.

11:42AM – Awkward movement as I slide from left to right trying to avoid coalition with another individual who in turn is also moving left and right. Don’t you hate it? When another person has the same thought process as you, and then you bump into each other. Luckily, he didn’t pickpocket me, I think lol…

11:39AM – As I not go through, I decide to take the street route, a car almost gets me. Slight moment of freak-out. I think I’ve seen this in a Christian movie about the Rapture years ago.

11:38AM – Go outside to get a tuna melt. Construction site in front of me, with ladders and a wet tunnel. The people before me go through. I decide to NOT go through.

10:15AM – Where is my post? There was an error in my iPhone, couldn’t publish it properly. Rescued it from my Drafts folder.

8:41AM – Huge crows rest on top of the building in front of me, and they make their spooky sound. I can only see their sihlouette because the sun is rising from behind.

8:39AM - Next Bus lies to me. It told me the next 30X would come in 7 mins, it came as I was walking. The bus driver closed the door on me.

8:34AM – Work email to my project manager doesn’t get sent. I am aware of how the cosmos is weird, so luckily I verify in my “Sent” folder and realize the email is missing. Have to rewrite it, and resend it.

8:30AM - I get the news one of my best friends is being cheated upon.

8:00AM - Wake up with annoying pain on my right foot. I can still walk.

Understanding Machiavelli through Disney

Re-release of 2004 essay I wrote for Virtual Procrastinators, and following thread generated by friends.

So, I was thinking there’s no better way of getting in the mood to
write on Machiavelli than by listening to Disney’s villain songs…
so, right now I’m listening to Ursula’s “Poor Unfortunate Soul”….
and yes, she is Machiavellic indeed.

“The only way of getting what you want is by becoming human”

Ursula

“I never thought hyenas essential
They’re crude and unspeakably plain
But maybe they’ve a glimmer of potential
If allied to my vision and brain.”

Scar

“Oh! Marry the shrew? I become sultan. The idea has merit!”

Jafar

Definitely, the most interesting villains Disney offers have read a
copy of The Prince or The Discourses. The main idea Machiavelli
shares with us is that, when it comes to ruling a kingdom, the end
justifies the means.

The reason these Disney Villains are so good is because they are very
real and have true motivations behind their actions. We love them
because they hold some truth in them… even though we root for
our “hero.”

Ursula was attacked by the laws of the kingdom. She learnt to do
things her way, to survive. They kicked her out because she didn’t
abide to their rules. The movie doesn’t really give us much
information regarding her past, but we do know she and King Triton
have a past. Surely she was once his right hand, and realized how
weak and incompetent he really was. Perhaps because he never had
sons? We never really know how those “under the sea” laws work, but
surely they were against females raising to power, yet we have this
king who continues having daughters (12 or something?) in his attempt
to bear at least one son. Yet he cannot. Or maybe he has had sons,
yet he kills them because he feels threatened by them. Perhaps King
Triton feels he will last forever? Perhaps the Trident *can* give him
ever-lasting life as well. Thing is though, no matter what the
situation is, Ursula knows him better than anyone else, and she has
developed a plan to get a hold of the power she longs for. She feels
apt to take power, she knows how to use the trident, and her
knowledge of magic helps her enhance that power. She, even though
hated by the royal family, feels harming them is the only way the
correct order of things can be achieved. As Machiavelli says: “We
have not seen great things done in our time except by those who have
been considered mean; the rest have failed.”

And then, we have Scar. Second in line, and upset with the way
kingdom laws randomly choose a heir to the throne. He finds utterly
absurd that such an important job (being king) can be determined by
how fast someone comes out of his royal mother’s uterus. Scar is
definitely smarter… yet his brother, bearer of brute strength is
king… but not for long. See, Scar has developed a subtler plan. He
has “arranged” the king’s dismissal, but without him being possibly
linked to the crime. Unlike Ursula, he really played his cards right,
taking advantage of the situation of being second in line. He figures
it is easier to remain king by pretending he is innocent and not
upsetting the lionesses, who are definitely a powerful fraction of
the government. Thing is though, he encounters something Machiavelli
says Cesar Borgia encountered as well when he rose to power: “extreme
and extraordinary misbehavior of fortune” aka bad luck. So it
happens, when Scar rose to power, a big drought took control of the
savanna. In other words, the economy dropped. The investors and
workers (the animal population) moved out of the kingdom, searching
for places with better economy. Which left Scar with bigger problems:
one would be the constant comparison of him with his belated brother
Mufasa (everyone starts blaming Scar and comparing him to the good
ol’ days in which Mufasa was alive), and second the mercenaries
(hyenas) who put him on top are out of control and creating a state
of anarchy in the already impoverished kingdom. Civil unrest was
unavoidable, and less when fortune would have it, the true heir to
the throne, Simba, comes back to “fix” things. We’ll leave this
subject on hold though, as we move on to our third example.

Jafar as royal adviser feels the same way Ursula surely felt when she
used to be trusted by King Triton (in a pre-The Little Mermaid era).
Jafar is smart, and the Arab lands would be nothing if he wouldn’t be
controlling things. The Sultan is an imbecile. He has toys he plays
with all day, and lacks leadership abilities. He can’t even find his
daughter a husband. So, Jafar feels he should start getting the
credit he deserves; after all, it is he who rules the kingdom anyway.
Taking advantage of his “second in line” state (similar to Scar’s,
yet not having the misfortune of dealing with a male heir), Jafar
tries to become Sultan through legal means. He will marry Princess
Jasmine because the law says she must marry him before her birthday,
if she doesn’t marry a prince before, that is. Thus, the Prince Ali
problem arrives. As luck would have it, just before the deadline,
Jasmine falls in love with this “prince,” making Jafar take desperate
measures by arranging Prince Ali’s dismissal. Prince Ali accuses
Jafar of the assassination attempt and also claims he has the Sultan
hypnotized, which is all a lie, of course. Jafar is ruined because of
this calumny, but (as Ursula) he finds more direct ways of getting
his vengeance. The finding of an uthopical magical object, the lamp,
helps him restore order and grasp power without having to depend on
thirds. But, as Machiavelli says: “there is nothing more difficult to
take in hand, more perilous to conduct, or more uncertain in its
success, than to take the lead in the introduction of a new order of
things. Because the innovator has for enemies all those who have done
well under the old conditions, and lukewarm (indifferent,
uninterested) defenders in those who may do well under the new.”

And now as all Thesis of “Punto Final” do, we must tie together all
three villains, and explain what went wrong in each case. One thing
Machiavelli teaches us is the study of elliptic history. That way we
learn how to play our cards.

The biggest mistakes these villains could do was to not hide their
evilness, not forming the right alliances, and not dismissing the
heirs to the throne when they had the chance to do so. In other
words, they played with their food. They let their emotions control
them, thus making them weak to their enemies. I’m afraid to include
Scar completely in this boat since neither his emotions nor his pride
ruined him. So, lets divide them up again, shall we?

Ursula let Ariel and Prince Whats-His-Name (Eric, who kinda looks
like Aladdin, only white) live without turning them
into worms (just as she did to Triton). How can you let enemies of
the new State roam around when your order is still young? That’s a
big No-No. She trusted she would be invincible with her new trident,
just as Jafar trusted his lamp. Trust in magical charms or fetishism
is not enough to maintain your State. Wits is, alliances, charisma…
tangible actions, knowing when to retreat, and pretending you’ve
retreated as well. Jafar and Ursula put so much thought into climbing
to power, they didn’t put that much thought in staying in power. And
that’s when, during that weakest hour, the previous princes pulled
the rug from under their figurative feet.

Scar on the other hand, he did manage to stay in power, and the only
thing he did wrong was not to send “troops” out and destroy the
hyenas. They knew too much, and they had grown too powerful as well.
When his order was young, the best way to reinforce his place would
have been to accuse the hyenas of subversive murderers and having
them killed. That way he would have gained his way into the lionesses
good side, and would have wiped out the only ones who could take him
out. In the end, bad luck and the return of a more liked suitor to
the crown brought his end… that, and letting the hyenas live.

So, I guess we have learnt brilliant plans aren’t enough to rule a
kingdom. Sometimes one has to take the backseat in life, simply
because destiny wants to spite us. If we plan to do a hostile take
over, we must kill all suitors to the throne, just like the Russians
did when they wiped out the Romanov Dynasty, even after the Tsars had
lost all power. Come to think of it, Maybe Ursula *was* Ariel’s
mother, thus it could explain why didn’t she kill her when she had
the chance. Perhaps some piece of motherly love was still there, and
all the hunger for power was just Ursula’s way of coping with the
loss. Another interesting fact is how both Jasmine and Aladdin are
Machiavellic characters. They trick Jafar because they want to usurp
his power. Jasmine pretends she’s in love with him, hurting his ego,
and Aladdin taunts him to get him to wish erroneously. Aladdin in the
end is the wisest man, he rises to power by being likable and by
taking the opportunity turmoil brings him, the opportunity to “save”
the kingdom. Iago, being the smart bird that he is, later assumes
Aladdin’s position (the position of a suck-up) and is able to enjoy a
life of luxury and peace.

So, maybe, just maybe, the Machiavellic way of thinking is not the
best way. Maybe kingdoms are bound to be won, and to be lost by acts
of fortune. Even though he was very smart, Machiavelli never
accomplished his dreams. Writing his stuff didn’t take him out of
political exile, and didn’t help him win Lorenzo the Magnificent’s
favor. He says: “he who has relied least on fortune is established
the strongest,” which is true, but in the end, perhaps things move in
what appears to be a more random order. Maybe Scar was right when he
said: “Life’s not fair, is it?”

-Alex

————————————————————–

Subsequent thead:

————————————————————–

Disney Villains used to be attractive, remember the evil queen in

Snow White and the witch in Sleeping Beauty, sure they look like

Drag Queens but hey, they kind of have a gothic type of beauty.

My theory on Ursula is that she was the king’s lover, I mean come

on, all those tentacles must make any merman go crazy for her. Then

Triton started an affair with little Sebastian and well poor Ursula

ended up depressed and emotional dependent on food, she used to have

quite a nice figure you know.

And no, Life isn’t fair at all, AT ALL! but it still has it’s

beautiful moments…

-Cecilia

————————————————–

ONCE I HEARD:

“GIVE POWER TO SOMEONE AND YOU’LL KNOW THEIR TRUE

SELF”

POWER, THE IDEA OF IT; THE ESSENCE, ITS COURSE IN

ACTION AND EVERY SINGLE DETAIL CONCERNING ITS

INVOLVING, IS DEFINITELY INTRIGUING.

THROUGHOUT HISTORY, THOSE WITH POWER ARE THE ONES

REMEMBERED; THE OTHERS, WHO WILL CARE.

IF ONE, REVIEWS THE ACHIEVEMENT OF THE FEW THAT

OBTAINED MAGNIFICENT POWER, MACHIAVELLI’S “PREACHINGS”

SEEM TO BE THE PATH THEY EMBRACED TO OBTAIN THEIR

DESIRABILITY.

THE TERM “MACHIAVELLI” HAS BEEN USED FOR CENTURIES AS

A SYNONYM OF EVILNESS. WE HAVE TO DISAGREE WITH THIS.

WHY SUCH A BRILLIANT MIND AS MACHIAVELLI BE DISTORTED

INTO A NEGATIVE TERMINOLOGY? “THE PRINCE” MAY BE

STILL SHOCKING TO MANY, BUT WE HAVE TO AGREE THAT IS

BRILLIANT.

MANY OF US(I MUST INCLUDE MYSELF) ARE INTERESTED IN

THE VANITY, THE GLORY, THE HUNGER OF ACHIEVEMENT THAT

SUM TO, OF COURSE POWER.

IF WE MAY COMPARE, WE ARE NOT VERY DIFFERENT FROM

ANIMALS; DARWINISM TEACHES THAT THE ONE WHO WILL

SURVIVE IS THE MOST FITTED TO DO SO. AND SO, WE MUST

THEN DEDUCE, THAT THE ONE THAT WILL RULE SHOULD BE

THE MOST FITTED FOR SUCH TASK. THE QUEEN BEE

THEORY…BUT WHY WAS THAT PARTICULAR BEE CHOSEN?, WHAT

MADE HER SO DIFFERENT FROM THE OTHERS?WHY SHE HAS THE

POWER AND THE OTHERS CANNOT? LUCK, DESTINY…??

OUR ERAS MAY NOT BE THE SAME AS MACHIAVELLI’S BUT HAVE

THINGS CHANGED AT ALL?

LENIN, STALIN, HITLER, CASTRO. WHY ARE THEY STILL PART

OF OUR HISTORY AND OUR PRESENT? BECAUSE MACHIAVELLI

WAS RIGHT, AS SIMPLE AS THAT.

CHAPTER 17 AS WELL AS CHAPTER 18 ARE POSSIBLY MY

FAVORITE CHAPTERS OF THIS “MASTERPIECE”.

“IT IS BETTER TO BE FEARED THAN TO BE LOVED”. YEP IT

SOUNDS LIKE A MAFIOSO SAYING, BUT HOW BRILLIANT!!!

CHAPTER 18, MACHIAVELLI ARGUES THAT THE PRINCE SHOULD

KNOW HOW TO BE DECEITFUL WHEN IT SUITS HIS PURPOSE.

WHEN HE SHOULD HAVE THE NECESSITY OF BEING DECEITFUL

HE SHOULD NOT APPEAR THIS WAY. INSTEAD HE HAS TO

EXHIBIT 5 VIRTUES: MERCY, HONESTY, HUMANENESS,

UPRIGHTNESS AND RELIGIOUSNESS.

SO IN OTHER WORDS TAKE THE WORLD FOR A SUCKER, LIE

AND MAKE THEM BELIEVE HOW GREAT YOU ARE. MAKE THEM

LOVE YOU BUT AT THE SAME TIME FEAR YOU. ISN’T THAT

WHAT GREAT RULERS DO? QUEEN BEES?

AND YES, DISNEY VILLAINS!

WHAT IS GREAT OF THE VILLIANS IS THAT DEEP INSIDE WE

ADMIRED THEM BUT FEEL GUILTY IN ADMITTING IT. WHY?

BECAUSE WE KNOW WE ARE NATURALLY EVIL.

URSULA KNEW TOO MUCH, SHE HAD POWER BUT BECAME BLINDED

BY IT, SO DID JAFAR AND SCAR. THEY WERE BLINDED BY THE

AMBITION POWER PROVIDED AND THEY WERE NOT CHOSEN, SOME

OTHER BEE WAS.MANY OF THE MEMORABLES RULERS FAILED AS

DID THESE DISNEY “VILLIANS” BUT WE ALL KNOW IT WAS FOR

THE SAME REASONS…

SOME PEOPLE MAY HAVE HUNGER FOR POWER BUT POWER

CHOOSES WHO HE WANTS TO EMBRACE. PERSISTANCE, SELF

ASSURANCE AND THE USE OF KNOWLEDGE MAY HELP BUT AT THE

END WHO WILL RECEIVE IT???

-KIKI

——————————————————–

I have to admit, I have not read Machiavelli’s work. I have used the

term once or twice, but never cared to find out why. This is a very

interesting discussion, but it got me thinking (yes, I can still

smell the smoke coming from my ears) about how maybe the villains

are not the only machiavellic ones…

Anyway, from what I could gather from the posts, this philosophy

basically states that it’s all about the power, no matter what means

one uses to achieve it, as long as it is achieved and maintained.

Quote: “Chapter 18, Machiavelli argues that the Prince should know

how to be deceitful when it suits his purpose when he should have

the necessity of being deceitful he could not appear this way

instead he has to exhibit 5 virtues: Mercy, Honesty, Humaneness,

uprightness and religiousness.”

But which characters in the Disney universe truly represent

this “ideals” but its heroes.

Quote: “Another interesting fact is how both Jasmine and Aladdin are

Machiavellic characters.”

Sure, villains have to be machiavellic, but, in the end, those that

are in power are the ones that set the rules… And who holds or ends

up in power in every Disney Movie? The “good guy”, right? Good guys

that show mercy, honesty and humaneness and in the end succeed in

convincing us that they (if they weren’t) are truly upright people

with a righteous set of beliefs. Of course, most of them start as

innocent, likeable, good natured, blah, blah, blah… And most of them

might even really be like that. But what matters here is that, in

the end, they are the ones that have overcome adversity and have

gain the “power” (be it freedom, success, conquest, status, a

consort, etc.).

Let’s check some of the most prominent animated movies Disney has

released (I would go into the non-animated ones but I don’t like to

mess too much with the master of machiavellic thought… Mary Poppins)

and it’s main characters…

“Dumbo” (1941). Dumbo. A little circus elephant, shunned by his

equals because of his over-sized ears, unknowingly avenges his honor

by becoming the Star of the Show.

“Bambi” (1942). Bambi. A coming of age story about a deer fawn grows

up and fights for a mate, survives a devastating forest fire, and

ultimately takes the place of his father, the Great Prince of the

Forest.

“Cinderella” (1950). Cinderella. A girl who has been shown little

love by her foster-family, finds the means to leave them behind and

become a Princess.

“Peter Pan” (1953). Peter and Wendy. An eternal boy, with the help

of his chosen consort, fights the evil adults… I mean pirates of

Never Never Land in order to become the “ruler” of the place.

“Robin Hood” (1973). Well, Robin Hood, duh! A fox manages to steal

from the rich and give to the poor, while outwitting the evil prince

and the sheriff of Nottingham.

“The Little Mermaid” (1989). Ariel. The youngest of twelve mermaid

princesses not happy with being just a princess finds a way to

become Queen.

“Beauty and the Beast” (1991). Belle. A poor, yet learned peasant

girl exchanges places with her father as the captive of a Beast.

Little by little gaining the loyalty of his followers and the key to

his heart, leading him to murder and to turn himself into a whole

new man.

“Aladdin” (1992). Aladdin. A thief steals his way into the sultan’s

daughter pants.

“The Lion King” (1994). Simba. A young cub learns from his father to

be kind to those that follow their leader and ruthless against those

that oppose.

“Pocahontas” (1995). Pocahontas. A young Native American princess

works her way out of an unwanted marriage by seizing the opportunity

to help out the enemy and become their link with her nation.

“Hercules” (1997). Hercules. A young demi-god learns the necessary

skill of a “hero” to win back his rightful place as the son of the

King and Queen of the Gods.

“Mulan” (1998). Mulan. A girl not happy with the role society

expects her to play joins the army disguised as a male in a campaign

against the barbarians that are invading her country, and by so

doing, gaining the affections of her superior and a recognition from

the emperor.

“The Emperor’s New Groove” (2000). Pacha. A man carries the burden

of helping a llama that used to be the emperor in order to win his

favor and not lose his home.

As you can see this movies are all about personal gain. Sure, love

and other subplots may develop along the way, but that is only to

make our heroes seem more human make them, and I quote, “…hold some

truth in them”.

It’s interesting though, how most of them acquire what they desire

by making an “alliance” to someone of the opposite sex in the same

or a higher station. Snow White, a Princess, had Prince Charming.

Cinderella also chose a Prince. Peter Pan a high society girl from

the suburbs (or should I say Wendy chose a man with many talents).

Sleeping Beauty could only be rescued by a Prince (commoners not

allowed). Robin Hood had to go after Maid Marian, who was kin to the

king. Ariel had to fall in love with Prince Eric. Belle had to

seduce a Beast, which was really a Prince. Aladdin went after the

Princess. Pocahontas went after John Smith, not necessarily a

nobleman, but with power enough amongst his people. Mulan after a

high-ranking officer and Pacha had to kiss a llamas’, I mean, an

emperor’s ass.

So, the easiest way to acquire power is to make an “alliance” with

someone that already possesses it. This says a lot about how Disney

wants people to look at the world. Those “less fortunate”, or with

aspirations outside of their current possibilities, will always, by

a struck of luck, find themselves someone who either: a)has a noble

title and riches but had little love during his/her live and now

will take anyone that will show them an ounce of love (i.e. Maid

Marian), b) only cares about good looks (i.e. Prince Charming), c)

is interested in exploring other species (i.e. Beast), d) bring

adventure into their lives (i.e. Jasmine), or e) are confused about

their sexuality (i.e. Mulan).

Once such a person has been found, one may encounter some…

competition, which “everyone” will believe to be “evil”. But with

the help of the little people that seem to be inspired by the great

amount of luck one of their own has had, the adversary shall be

annihilated and the ultimate goal: Power, shall be attained.

We can even take it as symbolic that most of them turn out to be

prince/sses or King/Queens in the end.

The only thing missing here is that they don’t get to power by their

own efforts:

Quote: “…there is nothing more difficult to take in hand, more

perilous to conduct, or more uncertain in its success, than to take

the lead in the introduction of a new order of

things. Because the innovator has for enemies all those who have

done well under the old conditions, and lukewarm (indifferent,

uninterested) defenders in those who may do well under the new.”

None of them would have come to power if it weren’t for the little

people that put them there, either because they wanted to reinstate

a former order, or because they wanted to replace it with a new one.

Demonstrating, alas, that without support they are nothing.

“Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs” (1937). The Seven Dwarfs. Without

them, the little white as snow princess would have never survived in

the forest and would have never been found by her Prince. Of course,

since they are the little people, she was never to lower to their

station, but there would always be a certain grade of affection…

Maybe as uncles twice removed… Or something like that.

“Dumbo”. Timothy Mouse. This little fellow became Dumbo’s manager.

Quite an unlikely character, but without whom this young pachyderm

would have never been able to fly.

“Bambi”. Flower the skunk and Thumper the rabbit. Bambi learns from

this unlikely pair of the forest’s wonders and dangers- especially a

danger called “Man.” Without them, our little Prince of the Forest

would have perished after his mothers’ demise.

“Cinderella”. Fairy Godmother, the mice. A little magic here, a

couple of mice turning into horses and an escort over there, and

Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo! What have we got? A new home away from the

evil step-mother and sisters. Hurray!

“Peter Pan”. Tinkerbell. This hot-tempered pixie could make anyone

fly with her fairy dust. So, why not use her gift to help Peter get

rid of the evil Captain Hook? Besides, all he had to do was make her

feel important and try to make her believe that size doesn’t really

matter.

“Robin Hood”. The Merry Men. Did you really think this beloved man

in tights could still from the rich without a gang? Welcome to the

Medieval Mafia.

“The Little Mermaid”. Sebastian and Flounder. Why get in trouble

alone, when you can get your friends in the king’s bad side as

well? Besides, with their musical talents and abilities to be in

the right place at the right time, how else did you expect her to

become the Prince’s bride?

“Beauty and the Beast”. Mrs. Potts, Lumiere, Cogsworth, Chip, etc.

With the help of this enchanted inanimate objects that want to

return to the way things were, Belle manages to seduce the Beast

into submission.

“Aladdin”. Genie, Abu and Magic Carpet. Without the monkey, there

was no lamp. Without the lamp, there was no genie. Without the

genie, there was no magic carpet. Without the magic carpet, there

wasn’t silly love song. Without silly love song, there was no

princess. Without the princess, there was no Prince.

“The Lion King”. Timon and Pumba. This was a relationship of

survival. Timon and Pumba showed Simba the ropes and Simba offered

them protection. Since Nala came along and ruined the relation they

had by putting kingly ideas in Simbas head, they had no choice but

to try and help in their protector’s cause. Besides, his success

meant their success.

“Pocahontas” The Willow Tree, the wind, the raccoon, the bumblebee.

They all knew a new world order was to arrive soon, the Virginia

Company. That’s why they chose to help Pocahontas know what was

coming and how to befriend he who would have been her enemy, John

Smith.

“Hercules”. Pegasus, Phil. Pegasus was made to serve Hercules. Phil

wanted the glory of being the trainer of a real hero (and not being

stroked down by Zeus’ lightning bolts).

“Mulan”. Mushu. Her family’s dragon “totem”. The one her ancestors

sent her to protect her on her journey. Just like Tinkerbell

in “Peter Pan”, no matter what the size, it came in handy from time

to time, besides, by helping Mulan, he would advance in status.

It’s also amazing that, even though our “heroes” are “normal”, some,

if not most, need of magical aid to succeed. Something that will set

them apart from the rest of the world. Not everyone has a magic

lamp, a pixie, or a fairy godmother. Which takes me to the delusion

of the Disney people that beings with such powers would submit so

easily and effortlessly to the whims of such selfish, self-centered,

lucky-as-hell individuals.

Quote: “So, maybe, just maybe, the Machiavellic way of thinking is

not the best way. Maybe kingdoms are bound to be won, and to be lost

by acts of fortune.”

Maybe “machiavellic” is one of those terms that acquire meaning

according from who’s mouth it comes from. If I say “machiavellic” in

this essay, I’m referring to those most of us would consider heroes,

for their actions are very shrewd and have only one goal, which is

not only a happy ending.

The poor, so-called “villains”, who’s only fault was the want/need

of change. They were “machiavellic” indeed. In fact, consciously

so. Unlike the “good guys” who carry out their plans unconsciously

out of habit. The “villains” only mistake lies in that they failed.

Failure is the cause of their “evilness”, of their “villainy”. For,

if they had succeeded, the “heroes” would have been they.

Who can assure you that they where “evil”? Who can tell you that

only chaos and mayhem would follow if they had won? People FEAR that

word (evil) so much? They FEAR change. They FEAR not been led, not

been told what to do, what to think. They FEAR loss. They FEAR

loneliness, insecurity. They FEAR not knowing what tomorrow may

bring…

That’s what the Wonderful and Magical World of Disney feeds us with

their wonderful art: FEAR.

FEAR, ambrosia for the “heroes”.

-RJ

————————————————————–

Jack’s Proposal &… Where the F*ck is Marla?

Glory Days

You only believe in things you would actually wear. And since I don’t care about clothes, I guess I lack a point of view.

When did this happen? I always thought I was deep. The type of person you’d actually want to listen to if they were cast in The Real World Season #31: Baghdad. Unfortunately I was never a housemate in that show. Not because they didn’t want me, but because I never even sent in my audition tape. I guess that’s all my life has ever been. A series of “never-really-tried.” My only true adversary is my past. Pathetic. Me competing against myself. The person from the present always resenting the past “glory” from my younger self. Always feeling my peak came, left, and I never knew it happened.

Marla, why did you have to go?

I wrapped my hands around your neck… as you begged me to fuck you by the window. Fuck you on fours while all neighbors pretended not to watch from their own windows. As they ate their dinners as big happy families, they stared at you getting pounded on the couch. You waved at the old lady who’s walking her three-legged cocker spaniel.

Lovely.

Between us, I was freaking out. Felt guilty, like I shouldn’t listen to you when you absentmindedly asked me to rape you. I shouldn’t have fucked you in your sleep neither. But fucking is like having a relationship with god. You think you love him, but in reality, you just want him not to kill you. And if god can give you the power to rule over others, then you’re all set.

So, maybe it was my desire to be one with god, and to have his power manifest itself through me, that lead my body to emit certain chemicals that lured the opposite sex (and sometimes the same sex…) more than ever before. And since the rule of life is, that when it rains it pours, my increase in sexual behavior only led to more sexual behavior. Funny thing is, as with everything, it all started with a lie.

I saw Emma again at another event a few months after my disastrous Marlboro party took place. Yes, the one that ended with my face being stitched into a new identity. That one.

She was making out with some other dude. I reacted the only way a mature responsible adult would, by approaching one of my female friends and telling her to pretend she was you. At first, I thought it wouldn’t work. I mean, c’mon… are we 5th Graders? Truth is, my friend started getting into it, and soon did Emma. I ended up going home with both of them that night.

Being one with god has it’s benefits.

———–

The city where no one is born. The place where no one belongs, that’s where we wanna go.

The telephone rings, and I stop soliloquizing. Unknown number. These calls are generally made by my paranoid landlord or by the guy who’s been trying to get me to renew my non-existing car insurance for ages. If only I would just give up and let him have my social security number, would his pre-recorded machine stop calling me? Is it all just for the chase?

Today it is neither of them, the man who introduced me to the Green Fungus world talks through the other end of the phone line with his thick accent, assuming I recognize his voice without the need for proper salutations. He says we should meet, emphasizes on how he has a “proposal” for me I can’t deny.

“Do I have a choice, Mike?”

“No.”

The one thing people in this city have in common, is the desire to leave something behind. Some try to relive a memory of a past long-gone. Others long to experiment with the swinger approach to life: never settling for one perspective fully. Sporting both sides of a coin at once. Ideal principles of counter-culture, plugged to dreams of technology and stability.

You wanna make some money? Grow your own weed, and risk having your balls tied up by a local cop who wants to get his hands on your goods. Or better yet, laundry some dough along with your sins at the casino of non-rejects, where tourists come and experience the washed down version of rebellion.

Given enough money and motivation, even things like rejection can be packaged and sold at your local Walgreens.

Everyone wants a piece of the action. Even when you aren’t born at a place where there’s any action.

Mike and I met for a beer, and that’s when he felt it was safe to tell me I could quit my job, because he was going to gay marry me.

“Excuse me?”

“I give you $100,000 a year. You give me citizenship.”

“That’s a lot of!! Ahem… Ok. Let’s be rational. Why me? Why not a girl?”

“I don’t know any girls. Everyone thinks I’m gay. It will work. Trust me. I take full responsibility. If anything happens, I won’t let you rot in jail. Not for too long at least.”

Mike gives me one of his awkward smiles. I never really asked him why he broke my face, or why he took me under his wing in the party scene. Truth is, I felt like I owed him. And marriage, well… I always wanted to be married, but not as much as I wanted to be divorced.

“Hi, my name is Jack… and I’m a divorcee.”

It had a nice ring to it, I must admit. Also, I was getting bored of my debts, and you were never coming back as stated by your last phone call.

“I’m never coming back.”

It seemed like the logical next step to add to my list of shit to do before I die was gay marriage indeed.

——————————-

“A lot of women are thinking about you today.”

“Um, really?”

She gently touches my face, and her fingers trail my forehead. I lift my hair to show her a not-so-neatly-closed scar I carry with some amount of pride.

“I remember how you got this. Your sexual prowess just filled the air that night… and I just haven’t been able to get you out of my head ever since.”

“Really? All that after one party?”

“Embarrassingly enough.”

She looked down with coy innocence, yet knowing we were both thinking the same thing. And that was: “How would it be like to fuck each other.” To just get up and interconnect our bodies in ways that would leave her with a urinary track infection.

I laughed off the tension and told her how last night concluded with the DJ following me to the Men’s bathroom, hoping I would let her blow me.

“Apparently she had been fantasizing about it for a while…”

“Who doesn’t?”

“What?”

“Nothing.”

I take a hit out of my bong, and my eyebrows frown reflecting my sudden discomfort.

“What was your name again?”

———————————————-

Mike and I get gay married at City Hall… and have our picture taken along dozens of other loving gay couples, as examples of love not being dead in this world. As examples of what’s good, clean, and progressive in modern society.

“Do you take this man to be your lawful wedded husband?”

The phone rings. It is you.

“Marla, I really can’t talk right now. Wait. Aha… umm. Can’t you see I’m busy?? I’ll call you in half an hour. I promise. Your visiting hours are over in 10 minutes? Well, I’m not visiting, I’m just calling you. Then why do you call me when you know they are going to have you hang up? Ugh, Ok… Don’t cut yourself! Bye.”

My eyes return to our South American lesbian rabbi priestess, and instruct her to continue with the ceremony.

After we are done, I don’t feel any different. The limo arrives, and before our chauffeur can get out of the vehicle, I open the door for Mike to get in first. Who said chivalry is dead? For the amount Mike’s paying, I could even blow him… I think. For now, I’m just moving in with him. His apartment was nicer than mine anyway.

———————————————-

Marla, you remember that time I had not showered for a week because all we did was fuck? Remember that night we were supposed to meet with friends (our self-imposed check-in with reality night) and the building ran out of water right after you took your shower.

No clean clothes; I felt ugly and dirty, yet it was too late to cancel. Waiting for the bus, you stood there in front of me, and gently began to dust off my attire. Rearranged my ironic baseball cap. Untucked my shirt, redid the laces on my tennis shoes… until I felt like new. I never felt loved more.

You broke me.

———————————————

Six months after our wedding, the interview with MIGRA took place. Mike and I had practiced. We knew everything about each other, from birthdays, to what color were our toothbrushes. What color was his underwear? Easy… he doesn’t wear any. I knew his family history, and he knew mine. We shared bank accounts, and extensive receipts of dinners together. What can I say? I was his bitch in the afternoons, and he let me off the hook during the nights to do what I had to do… which was to drown myself in self-pity and pointless pleasures.

The interviewer looks at both of us for a minute without saying a word. His first question unfortunately is,

“What’s Jack’s phone number?”

Mike is blank. Same question is addressed to me.

“What type of question is that?? I’m seriously offended. I mean, that’s what cell phones are for. Right?”

Two weeks later, the door bell to our apartment rings at 6:25 am. Mike leaves his generic bedroom (the one that can pass as a guest room in case of emergency), drowsily walks to the door… and without paying attention, he opens it. A middle-aged Chinese lady is standing there with a briefcase, a notepad and a pen. Mike smiles awkwardly, and shouts:

“Jack, honey! We have company!”

Silence… not really.

The government agent lets her quiet footsteps guide her to where she must go. Our apartment is not that big anyway.

Mike keeps shouting my name, mixed with sweet words like “HONEY!” or the more desperate “LOVE OF MY LIFE!” I should have known that behavior was unusual. Very unlike Mike…

The door to my bedroom was only half-way open, yet after a gentle push that coincides with a mild squeak, the door is no longer a barrier to the eyes that intercept the antagonistic scene taking place. Chinese eyes glare at my naked body, as I pound an Emma who’s currently on fours with her hair being tugged by one of my fists, as my other hand just locks her wrists behind her sweaty back.

Sad thing is that, even then, as the Chinese lady grows paler by the second, as she annotates furiously on a notepad… I still feel the need to finish Emma off.

———————————————

Marla, you really broke me.

The Perfect Love

The perfect love, unstained, fresh, scarless, frozen in time.
Love zapped into another realm, beautiful, firm, young, and perfect.
The gift of Spring, Summer waves take back to the ocean.
Like James Dean, always remembered as a metaphor, escaping the torment of the literal world.
A smile and a kiss decorated with tears. No let downs.
Feelings that fly up where the birds go. Sometimes even higher.
Bewitched.

Bodies shake in denial at the abrupt separation. Shocked.
Your memory in my pocket, holding your shadow by the hand.
Did you also forget yourself? Maybe I knew you from before.
When the music spoke, I could hear your thoughts.
The perfect love. Maybe never meeting again.
Maybe never feeling this way again. No decay.

Words escape. Benign fruit of the spirit.
Love that is not envious, or boastful. Love that is safe.
I gave you a bouquet made out of stars. You decorated the room with water petals.
The departed can always paint the sky with sweeter colors.
The colors are just as we imagined.
A construct we tell ourselves, a story we carve in the wind.
Kindness, admiration, and grace.
Hope of maybe someday… maybe.
Released by the sunrise.

Vivir es llorar

obelisco en la oscuridad

Corazon perdido. Cada silaba… cada palabra… jugosamente deconstruida. Con Bob Marley en el fondo, tu me contestas desde mi imaginacion. Por cada corazon que rompo, otro corazon rompe el mio. El juego de los amorosos… el tira y hala. La hidra del cuento hinchandote el cuello, acariciando ideas efimeras de ternura y pasion… que mueren como ratas en gestacion. Solo quedas tu, arte querida, que me permite escribir y comunicar con reciprocidad, con amor puro, sensaciones eroticas respetuosas, caricias imaginarias, sensacion indispensable, momento pasajero, sisterna de desechos. Con cada adjetivo, mis sentimientos mueren, y me convierto en robot mecanico, ser de rutina… distraido por segundos, regresando a la rutina rustica y ordinaria. La rutina de la falta de amor, lleno de erotismo grotesco, de aceptacion, de derrota, antagonico. Con cada soyoso silencio, le digo al destino que me tome y que me haga suya. Sin dios y sin diablo… una quimera monstruosa y despreciable. Pocos momentos en que sentirse vivo, significa llorar.

The Day the Pigeon Died.

8-bit Mary

Today is the day the pigeon died. The day the pigeon died is the anniversary of when you first tried to break up with me. You stopped going to work, and you said you needed to travel down to Santa Rosa to spend your birthday and Thanksgiving at the beach with the whore you call your best friend. The day you get back to the city, I pick you up at the airport, only to find you as dry as ever. Ready to drop me off your life, and even more ready to get high. I told you to stop listening to Rilo Kiley because when you are under the influence, you feel all songs speak to you. You said it wasn’t Rilo Kiley, but me stealing your laundry quarters that got to you. I said me stealing your laundry quarters had nothing to do with it, because I would replace them tomorrow. You said it was just the principle of it… and that, if you were to die, I was no longer in charge of giving your diaries away to the city’s Historical Society. Immortality.

We got back together soon enough, but I guess that was just the symptom of what was to come. Today, as I see a dying pigeon with absolute paralysis, laying with his legs turned to stone, facing the sky, and without possibilities of regaining mobility, I think of you. Call it a pigeon stroke, but his head seemed lucid, and his eyes upset at my intrusion. How dare I interrupt him in his death bed? How dare I steal your laundry quarters?

Years later after we crossed the great divide, everything you hated about me has changed. I stopped stealing quarters… and not only that, I hate many things you hate too. It is as if through negative conditioning, you transfered your pet peeves to me. Now I cannot stand people who don’t divide their colors from their whites, people who are needy, non-recyclers, people who don’t tip, people who eat crap, anyone who doesn’t work, doesn’t wear layers, and all those who don’t understand the importance of moisturizing.

So, why do I remember all this today out of all days? Could it be true that humans have some sort of cellular memory unexplained by scientists? This cellular memory can make you feel sadness or pain in specific moments, simply because the planet’s rotation tells your body where you’ve been in time. And this memory causes your body to react to things your conscious mind doesn’t remember. So maybe that’s why today I felt the need to prey on a pure heart, seduce, and hurt them the same way you do. See also: Role playing. See also: Perpetuation of Abuse. See also: Numb.

One day, the same way today’s pigeon met his death, you and I will also die, and none of this shit will matter. Who cares about quantum physics, cellular memory, missing quarters, ironic-Britney fans, and all those pseudo-religions? As a materialist I say that religion, poetry, and love is what unites us to the unknown divine, and as soon as the divine is achieved and known, once the kingdom of god reaches us with absolute perfection, there will be no more religion, heaven, or hell, because we’ll live in it.

Sponsored by:
The What Would The Techno Chicken Do Foundation

Unity In Equality Rally Poster

Unity In Equality

When a large amount of the population wants to band against a smaller group claiming they are an “abomination,” not only do I worry, I panic. And when that large group discovers a loophole in the Constitution, court decisions such as “Wade v. Roe,” stem cell research projects, and gay rights can become a fatality to our American Idol type of democracy. 52% voted against you, sorry… but you are out. Who needs legislators anyway when a mob can make the law?

Come show some love this Saturday, November 15th, 10:30 A.M. PST, at San Francisco’s City Hall, and support the people who feel your rights are not up for grabs! Turn this anti-Prop 8 shenanigans into a positive campaign for equality. See ya there!

-Alex



Copyright © 2004–2009. All rights reserved.

RSS Feed. This blog is proudly powered by Wordpress and uses Modern Clix, a theme by Rodrigo Galindez.